Holly Madison was honored with the 2011 Beautiful Humanitarian Award 7-31-11 x19

Best & Worst Moments of the Guy’s Choice Awards 2011

Okay, you’ve probably seen the MTV Movie Awards airing ad nauseum on MTV, but did you watch all two hours of the Spike TV Guy’s Choice Awards last night? No? Oh, then you didn’t miss a thing. Other than a bunch of unbleeped cuss words, the show was just a giant “We love our Troops” orgy-fest. Not that it’s a bad thing, but when you got hot chicks in the crowd, the camera should focus more on THEM.

Whatever, let’s just discuss my Best and Worst Moments from this show, shall we?

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BEST MOMENTS

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–SEAN PENN DOES SPICOLI!
Robert DeNiro handed out a Mantler to the cast of “Fast Times at Ridgemont High” and much to everyone’s surprise, Sean Penn was actually there to accept the award AND….ended his speech with a total Spicoli moment!

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–ROSIE HUNTINGTON-WHITELEY’S AWKWARD KISS
The Transformers hottie won for the “Our New Girlfriend” award and as the camera cut to her reaction, Rosie was leaning in towards Erin Heatherton (her Victoria’s Secret co-worker) to give her a peck on the cheek, but it seemed Erin was going for a full-on liplock in which Rosie quickly just stood up, making Erin “miss” the kiss. I don’t get it, but it was almost hot!

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–MINKA KELLY’S BOOBS
The only good thing worth looking at when it comes to her.

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–TRIUMPH THE INSULT COMIC DOG
It’s Triump, what do you expect?!?

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WORST MOMENTS

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–JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE’S GOD-AWFUL PREACHER MONOLOGUE
Justin Timberlake’s 2-minute “Can I get a Hell yeah, my brothas!” preacher monologue was just so painful to watch. In fact, he sounded more like a frat boy trying to give a speech to his drunk frat brothers at a late-night kegger. Had this speech been given to Samuel L. Jackson, it might’ve been more effective. And funnier. Screw you, Timberlake!

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–CAMERON DIAZ
Why? Just……WHY?!?

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–TWO WORD: JENNIFER. ANISTON.
I’m so sick and tired of this woman. Jen won the award for “Decade of Hotness” (which I humbly disagree for her to win). And to cap off her win, she thanked everyone for making her the most overrated actress on Earth. Hey, if anybody deserves this award more than Jen, it’s mutherfuckin’ Angelina Jolie!

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–JIM CARREY’S INCESTUAL ANAL RAPE STORY
Ah, there’s nothing funnier than to make jokes about anal rape. And Jim totally killed it for himself and everyone else. Sorry, Jim, not funny.

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–BRETT FAVRE’S PENIS INTERVIEW
Why the Hell are we still talking about Brett Favre? Is anyone aware that nobody gives a shit anymore? FUCK!

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–DOUBLE-STICK TAPE
Rosie was the only woman in the entire show that had the lowest-cut dress with cleavage staring you in the face. Unfortunately, Rosie wore double-stick tape which meant NO goddamned nipslips! BOOOOO!!!!

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And there you have it! Two hours of your life you’ll NEVER get back. Like me!

Natalie Portman – 62nd Annual Golden Globe Awards x 3 High Res

Poses with the award she won for best supporting actress for her work in “Closer,” at the
62nd Annual Golden Globe Awards
Beverly Hills, Ca
Sunday, Jan. 16, 2005